Into the Fade
by MirriTandris
Summary: Hawke gets left behind in the Fade after Adamant, but Anders isn't ready to let her go. Rated T for language and safety.


**Wow, it's been quite a while since I've written fanfiction. This was initially going to be a one-shot, but now it's striking me as being 2-3 chapters instead.  
Clearly, I don't own Dragon Age or any of its characters - that honor goes to Bioware.  
Enjoy!**

* * *

"Shit."

The creature in front of Ellissia Hawke was a mass of pincers, tentacles, and legs. Too many legs.

"Why is it always spiders?" She muttered, "Why is it always big, mutant spiders?"

 _I'm sorry, Anders. It looks like I won't be coming back after all._

"Me and my big, diplomatic mouth. If it had been any other Grey Warden than Stroud, I wouldn't have even considered volunteering to stay with this freak _**thing**_."

It was advancing on her, its mouth opened wide and ethereal _**goop**_ was dripping from its pincers. With a yell, Ellissia hefted her staff and aimed a fireball directly into the beast's open jaws.

* * *

"How the fuck could you leave her behind, Inquisitor?" Varric's voice cracked with grief and rage as the group stared blankly at the point where they had run out of the Fade, which had closed just as Stroud's boot cleared the opening.

"She volunteered, Varric," the Qunari shrugged.

"So did he!" Varric roared, pointing an accusing finger at Stroud, "And I'd rather have Hawke around than some Warden with Corypheus muttering in his head!"

"We need the Wardens more than we need Hawke. The Wardens are an army. Hawke was just a woman."

Varric growled, rounding on Desiradze. He pointed a short finger at her, and the difference in their heights would have been comical if the situation hadn't been so serious.

"So. Are. You."

With that, Varric stormed away, leaving the Inquisitor and Stroud staring after him.

* * *

"Red, I need you to find someone for me."

"No preamble, Varric? It seems that pleasantries are escaping you," Leliana replied, a twinkle in her eyes, but her face otherwise impassive. Varric sighed, frustrated, and rubbed his hand over his face.

"Red, it's a matter of life and death. Hawke…she could still be alive, and I can't leave my friend – my _**best**_ friend – behind when the possibility exists that she can be rescued."

"And you think that you know someone who can go into the Fade and get her out?" Leliana was interested. She remembered Arl Eamon's son, Connor, and knew that Varric's idea had merit, though it would be harder with the Circles disbanded. Varric chuckled.

"I don't just think I know someone."

Leliana smiled.

"You want me to find Anders, don't you?"

Varric glanced around, making sure there was no one around to overhear.

"Yeah. I have a lead, and I need this done on the sly. Seeker and the Inquisitor absolutely can _**not**_ know about this, understand?"

"Tell me what you know."

* * *

Six weeks had passed since Leliana had sent ravens to Tevinter in search of Anders, and Varric was growing more impatient with every passing hour. He'd refused to travel with Desiradze to the Emerald Graves, still not wanting to forgive her for leaving Hawke behind in the Fade. It admittedly bothered him a bit, though, that she had simply shrugged and gone off to ask Sera to accompany her instead, but he couldn't risk missing Anders if the mage showed up – if he could even be found.

But his contact had never failed him before. It was how he found Hawke again in the first place, after all. Anders would be found. He had to.

"Varric?"

Varric spun around, grabbing Bianca without a second thought. He relaxed slightly at the sight that greeted him, but didn't lower Bianca.

"Blondie."

Anders held his hands up as Varric appraised him. While he'd always been thin, Anders had developed an emaciated look. His brown eyes were sunken, and if Varric looked closely enough, he could see Anders's cheek bones – and he bet that every one of the mage's ribs were visible under his robes.

"What's the matter, Blondie? You do remember that people are supposed to eat, right?"

"Food's scarce, and Justice keeps forgetting. Anyway, Ellissia's the one who can cook," Anders replied with a shrug, "Where…where is she? I would have expected to be passionately jumped by now."

"I doubt she'd want to break anything. You're looking just a bit fragile, Blondie," Varric said with a small smile, before taking on a more somber expression, "But that…is why I asked you to come here."

Anders stared down at the dwarf, "Where is Ellissia, Varric?"

Varric turned away, lowering Bianca (much to Anders's relief). What he said next made Anders's blood run cold.

"We had some…problems, Anders. She got…left behind."

There was perhaps half a second of silence before Varric found himself pinned up against the rough stone wall of Skyhold staring into the ice-blue glow that had taken over Anders's eyes.

" **WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE GOT LEFT BEHIND, DWARF**?" The voice of Justice echoed throughout the halls, and Varric thanked his lucky stars that Josie was out socializing with some Nevarran noble and that Cullen had decided to drill his troops in the field today.

"It was absolutely not my choice, Anders…Justice…whoever you are! Do you honestly believe I'd leave my best friend in the Fade in favor of _Stroud_? Andraste's tits, Hawke would be halfway back to Tevinter by now if it were up to me."

" **YOU WILL TELL ME WHO MADE THAT CHOICE, THEN, AND I WILL SEE THEM BROUGHT TO JUSTICE** ," Justice growled out, not loosening his grip on Varric's open shirt in the slightest.

"Much as I would _love_ to hand that Tal-Vashoth bitch over to you, she seems to be the only one who can heal that massive gash in the sky," Varric replied sourly, "Now, would you mind letting me down and bringing Anders back to the forefront of your collective consciousness so that maybe we can figure out a way to rescue his lady love?"

With a cry, Anders's eyes went back to their warm brown and, without Justice's strength holding him up, Varric slid down the wall to land in a heap on the floor. Anders fell to his knees, clutching his head and letting out an anguished yell.

"Ellissia…"

* * *

"So this is Anders, is it?" Leliana asked, looking the mage up and down, "Are you sure he's healthy enough for this plan?"

"You have a plan already?" Anders looked between Leliana and Varric, bewildered.

"Well…in a matter of speaking, yes," Varric was hesitant, and still not meeting Anders's eyes.

"Out with it, then. Anything is better than leaving Ellissia in the Fade!" Streaks of blue were breaking out across his face, and his voice was growing deeper. Varric took a deep breath and, with a look to Leliana, began to speak.

"Red here traveled with the Hero of Ferelden while she…well, became the Hero of Ferelden. One of the things they accomplished was saving the son of Arl Eamon – the last arl of Redcliffe, before Teagan and then Tevinter took it over. The boy had been possessed by a desire demon –"

"He was an abomination?" Anders interjected.

"Yes, yes, but that's not the important bit!" Varric waved his hand impatiently, "The _important_ thing is how they managed it! They sent a mage directly into the Fade, and…"

"And she destroyed the demon possessing the boy and saved him from the Fade," Leliana finished. Anders sat there, looking unimpressed.

"Varric, we did the same thing for Feynriel. There's a difference between saving someone from being possessed and bringing someone physically back from the Fade."

"Well, trying it is better than sitting on our asses and letting Hawke meet up with whatever nasty demons and…other things that seem to call that hellhole their home. And you don't even want to know what that Tal-Vashoth left her there with," Varric was standing now, nose to nose with Anders, who gulped.

"Left her there with?" Anders's voice was strangled.

"Too many legs. Too many pincers," Varric responded with a shudder.

"Andraste's great flaming ass, Varric, what the hell are we waiting for, then?" Anders shouted.

"Well, the lyrium necessary, mainly. I had an order put in, pulled a few strings with my contacts – well, a lot of strings, if I'm being perfectly honest – but it should be here by the end of the week."

"Varric, that's not soon enough. Ellissia is in _danger_ , and **I WILL NOT LET ANOTHER HOUR PASS WITHOUT SEARCHING FOR HER**."

Justice had come to the forefront once again. Varric looked to Leliana.

"Is there another way to do this without gallons of lyrium?"

"Well, if you feel comfortable with the other mages finding out about Anders being here, we could manage to send him in with a ritual," Leliana replied. Varric chuckled darkly.

"Oh, I'd love to see Vivienne's reaction to Anders. Solas and Dorian might be alright with meeting him, though," Varric paused, "Will that be enough?"

Leliana shook her head, "Even with Vivienne, that wouldn't be enough. No, we needed First Enchanter Irving and five senior enchanters to send Wynne into the Fade."

Varric looked around surreptitiously, "We _could_ always sneak some of the Templars' lyrium. I doubt they'd miss it, especially if I replace it with the shipment I'm expecting."

" **YOU BROUGHT ME HERE WITH TEMPLARS RUNNING RAMPANT? ARE YOU MAD, DWARF?** "

"Hey, hey, Justice, almost all of them are out training with Cullen. You're safe, especially here. In the rafters. With the spymaster. Who everyone else is terrified of."

Was it a trick of the light, or was there a smirk on Leliana's face at Varric's words?

"Borrowing the lyrium would be the most prudent idea, then. We will still need a mage to perform the ritual, though. And before you ask, no, Anders, it can't be you to perform it."

" **I AM AWARE OF HOW THESE RITUALS WORK, WOMAN. WE SHOULD NOT HESITATE ANY FURTHER. THE TIME FOR ACTION IS NOW** ," Justice's voice echoed throughout the rafters.

"He's not very helpful at strategizing when he's like this, Red. Sorry," Varric shrugged apologetically.

"Is there any mage here you would trust enough to share Anders's presence with, Varric?" Leliana asked.

"Dorian is from Tevinter. He's bound to run into Anders sooner or later, so why not let them meet now?"

* * *

"So this is the man who blew up Kirkwall and started this whole mage war mess? A pleasure, I'm sure," the Tevinter mage said with a roguish grin as he looked Anders up and down.

" **GET ON WITH IT, MAGE** ," Justice boomed, grinding Anders's teeth harshly.

"Ooh, you know, I heard about the spirit possession. This is fascinating – you really must let me ask you some questions when you return," Dorian trailed off at the look on Anders's face, and looked at Leliana, "You've procured the necessary supplies, I would assume?"

"The entire lyrium supply in Skyhold is at your disposal, Dorian," Leliana replied demurely. Dorian gave a broad smile and clapped his hands together.

" _Excellent_! I'll need two to start with – it's not a simple procedure, after all – and Anders, I'll need you to sit here – yes, there we are. Ooh, you are skin and bones, we simply must feed you both before you depart. Good, now…you've been to the Fade before? Of course you have, you were in the Circle. I've heard all the stories. I must say, your tale is _quite_ popular in Minrathous. Right. I think we're ready to begin," Dorian bustled around the rookery, moving Anders away from the balcony railing and taking swigs of a lyrium potion. Leliana's eyes widened, as though she had just thought of something.

"Dorian? You can send Anders to the Fade in Adamant from here? When Wynne was sent in, she had to be in the Arl's castle to even have a hope of reaching Connor."

"Ah, Leliana, circle mages aren't nearly as adept at this ritual as I am. It does, of course, help that my father apprenticed a Somniari for a time," Dorian smiled lecherously, "And what a _delightful_ creature he was."

"A Somniari? Do you mean Feynriel?" Varric asked, and when Dorian nodded he quipped, "Well. It's a small world after all."

"Now, I will need some space for this. Varric, if you and Leliana could keep watch around the doors, I'll begin," Dorian said, opening up his next vial of lyrium and taking a sip. Varric moved to the stairs, fingering Bianca as he stood, peering down. Leliana stood at the door to the stone walkway that led to Cullen's office. Standing in front of Anders, Dorian began to chant, allowing the magic to fill the room and surround Anders, who winced as he felt himself begin to drift off into the Fade before collapsing altogether. Dorian lowered his hands.

"And now, we wait."


End file.
